How to be Greater as a Leader - By Seeing Beyond Labels
By Becky Thomas
This video is cycling around Facebook and somehow it’s the first time I’ve seen it:
It reminds me of the quote I once heard that stated, "For a man to be considered a good leader he must be tough. For a woman to be considered a good leader, she must be both tough and caring." (Source Unknown)
One of the greatest memories I have from a leadership conference is when a gentle-looking older lady that was a US ambassador told a story about a time when she was talking with a bunch of "war lords" (her words). She asked them, "Would you have gone to war if there were a woman leader with you, sitting at the table?"
Their response was, "No. We wouldn't have. Women don't send their sons out to kill other women's sons.”
Having a woman at the table is not about a "me too!" mentality. It's about bringing different perspective that helps shape the conversation and the path away from group-think into a holistic view of what's possible. Of course I’d like to see more women CEOs and higher-level leaders in organizations. More on the billionaire list (that aren’t wives of billionaires) not only for equality, but for the equal and balanced perspective that would bring to organizations around the world.
The YouTube Pantene ad above states, “Don’t let labels hold you back.”
That doesn’t mean people that when people call you bossy just ignore them and be bossy anyway. The bigger message for leaders in general - both men and women - is, "OK, everyday you're doing what you’re doing, but who are you BEING when you’re doing what you’re doing?" For men and women, it’s time to be greater.
Is the “bossy” label just fun to say? Or if the same ‘bossy’ words were coming from a man would you use the same label?
Case in point from a noteworthy article from the European Business Review called Women Leaders, The Gender Trap, where they describe an experiment implemented by Frank Flynn, a professor at Stanford Graduate Business School. He tweaked an existing case study from Harvard Business School about a woman named Heidi Roizen, a Silicon Valley entrepreneur. Half of his class received the original case which talked about Heidi, while the other half were given a case where the name had been changed to Howard throughout.
Prior to the class, he asked the students to go online and rate their impressions of Roizen on several dimensions, and he found that they tended to be far harsher on Heidi than Howard. As Flynn recalls: “Although they think she’s just as competent and effective as Howard, they don’t like her, they wouldn’t hire her, and they wouldn’t want to work with her. They disliked Heidi’s aggressive personality. The more assertive they thought Heidi was, the more harshly they judged her (but the same was not true for those who rated Howard).”
We all want to be seen for who we are, not just what we do. Provide that same opportunity to others. Challenge yourself from time to time and notice the labels you use. See what comes up. Let’s all try to come from a place of curiosity so that all leaders can have a fair chance without labels.
